The PrisonCare Podcast

A prison is an uneasy neighborhood made up of residents, officers, staff, and administrators. Compassionate people can learn ways to support positive prison culture from outside the walls. Join Sabrina Justison (whose son, J, is incarcerated) to deepen your awareness of often-ignored populations in our society. Educate yourself and your local community about practical ways to make things better on the inside. Learn to encourage and support incarcerated people AND those who provide for their custody, care, and control. Together we can work toward a better future where restorative practices and normalization efforts make life behind the walls better for EVERYone who must spend time there. Begin prison reform before a single piece of legislation is passed! prisoncare.org sabrinajustison.com

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The PrisonCare Podcast

Less Than Ten Minutes

February 06, 2023 • Sabrina Justison • Season 1 • Episode 34

0:00 | 18:43

Sabrina shares from a live event one of her favorite exercises for potential pen pal encouragers: "10 Minutes (or Less!) to True Awesomeness!"
Walk through the process, and see how easy it is to write...and invest in the mental well being of Correctional Officers, as well as residents. *mind blown*

Time Markers:

1:50 Two Reasons for this Practical Episode

2:50 Invite me!

5:30 10 Minutes (or Less!) to True Awesomeness

8:30 Take Out Your Phone and Write Your First Letter!

10:00 A Free List of Letter Starters, In Case You Feel Stuck

11:30 They Actually Feel Stuck, Too

13:00 A Quick Recap of the Less Than 10 Minute Process

13:50 No Matter How You Come At This Thing

16:20 Caring for COs by Writing to Residents - Mental Wellness for ALL

17:53 Wanna be on the Podcast?

Intro/Outro MUSIC CREDIT:
We've Come A Long Way (No Vocal Version)
Exzel Music Publishing (freemusicpublicdomain.com)
Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0
http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/

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Welcome to the PrisonCare Podcast!

I’m Sabrina Justison, founder of PrisonCare.org, equipping compassionate people to support the often-invisible people groups who make up a prison neighborhood - the inmate residents, correctional officers, staff, administration, and the families of all of these folks.

Join me for this week’s episode, and be encouraged to think, care, and respond as we explore the challenges facing prison neighborhoods everywhere.

Let’s support positive prison culture from the outside, because EVERYone on the inside matters.

Hello, friends, Sabrina here with a very practical episode today of The PrisonCare Podcast.

This is the day where you get to quickly walk through one of my favorite exercises to use when I am speaking in person with a Compassion Team that is just getting their feet wet in adopting a prison, that is learning how to be Pen Pal Encouragers. And I call this this presentation, “Pen Pal Encouragers: 10 Minutes to True Awesomeness,” because this is actually less than 10 minutes. I did cut just a little bit out of the audio, just a couple of the sort-of dead spaces, where I was giving people time to actually read something or dictate something into their phones. But even before I edited out those couple of quiet spaces, it was only about eight and a half minutes. So this is significantly less than 10 Minutes to True Awesomeness!

(1:50)And I wanted to share this for a couple of reasons. First of all, I wanted to let you know that I love talking to groups that are learning how to adopt a prison and learning how to become penpal encouragers. I know that it is not intuitive for a lot of people. It’s funny, because when I first started this journey a couple of years ago, I assumed it would be intuitive to people. And I was lovingly told by friends I respect, “Sabrina. You're weird. This makes sense to you, and it feels like your native language, but it really doesn't to most of the human race.”

So okay, live and learn. I discovered that it is not intuitive. This being a penpal encourager thing requires a little bit of coaching, it requires some prompts and some ideas. And so this is like encouragement for encouragers. And this is a little presentation that I like to work into my speaking gigs, when I'm out and about.

{ 2:50 } So, I want you to know that I like speaking in person to groups, who are learning how to be compassion teams and learning how to be pen pal encouragers. I find it to be really, like, inspiring for all of us when we come together in a space. And you know, that could be a real space. It can be a virtual space. I mean, I love to be in an actual room with actual people.

Whether that's an auditorium, with a whole bunch of people in it, or whether that's a small room at the library. Or if it's somebody's living room with 15 people in it, you know, whatever — the feel in person is, of course, wonderful. But during COVID, we all learned that we can't always have that, and that Zoom is not that bad as an alternate. So, virtual or in person, I love speaking with people because that face-to-face, and that interaction, and the chance to ask your questions, and the chance to share ideas, and watch the expressions on other people's faces as they sort of catch the vision…it’s really empowering. It’s really inspiring.

It's inspiring to people who are new to this, and they catch it and go, “Oh! Oh, I could do that. Oh, that's not that hard. Yeah, okay cool.” But I also get inspired because I see people catching the vision. I see people learning to care for prison neighborhoods in a new way. So part of the reason I'm sharing this, too, is just to let everyone know if you would like for me to speak to your group, you need to send me an email, Sabrina@prisoncare.org. And my schedule is as limited as anybody else’s, you know — life, and all that! But I do find time to speak to groups fairly often. And some of it depends on location, but I also travel quite a bit, so that might piggyback on a trip that I'm taking for something larger. I actually spend a fair amount of time in about four different areas of the country, so don't be shy.

Reach out if you would like to learn more about how maybe we could connect, and if not in person, then we could schedule to have a virtual meeting.

All right, so two reasons for today's podcast episode: one is for you to get some actual straight-up encouraging and instruction on how to be a penpal encourager, “Less than 10 Minutes to True Awesomeness.” And the other is to invite you to invite me to come speak.

(5:30) All right, so, let's jump into this. Now, the audio quality is going to shift a little bit because this is audio pulled from an in-person event, right? And actually, it's funny because part-way through, my microphone battery pack died. But I like the, I like the energy in this one. I liked that this particular group of people was fun, and they just…there was a lot of warmth and a lot of love in the room. So I decided to go with it. Even though the microphone slipped out in the middle, you can still hear me. I cleaned it up a little bit on GarageBand, so we should be all good. So, with that intro, I'm going to share with you. "Being a Pen Pal Encourager: 10 Minutes or Less to True Awesomeness.”

——————————————

(from the live event recording)

All right, welcome, friends!

We are going to find out how to be a Pen Pal Encourager.

Ten minutes to true awesomeness!

It really does only take ten minutes to write to an incarcerated friend, once you get the hang of it and this method.

(6:30) So, first of all, we are going to hit the first slide, and we’re gonna say, “Think in terms of messages, not letters.”

Ok, this is where a lot of us get hung up, right at the starting gate. We feel like, “writing a letter,” it sounds like a school assignment.

It sounds like it’s going to take a lot of time. It sounds like you should do it in your best penmanship.

All of this, not true.

What our friends who are incarcerated need more than long letters, is they need regular reminders they are remembered, that they have value, that we want them to know we’re thinking about them, ok?

If you reach a point in a relationship with someone where you want to write long letters, that’s great! Do it. If you’re a letter writer - fabulous!

If you’re not a letter writer, you can still be a pen pal encourager.

We’re gonna think conversational. We’re gonna think more in terms of a text message.

And we’re gonna simply send a reminder that our incarcerated friend matters to someone on the outside. Next slide, please!

We’re gonna use our technology.

If you have a smartphone, I’m gonna ask you to pull it out and open your NOTES app.

And we are gonna use voice-to-text using the Notes app on your phone.

This makes it possible to correspond with your pen pal from a red light, if it’s a fairly long red light. Okay? It’s that easy.

If you’ve got your phone on you, you can do this.

Now, if you’re just sending a generic, starting to get-to-know-you letter, that’s what we’re gonna practice together today.

Obviously, if you have begun corresponding with someone, you know more about them, and you’re responding to one of their letters, well, then, you’re gonna want to have their letter in front of you when you’re replying to it.

For this morning, we’re gonna practice a Getting Started first letter.

All you’ll need to do is voice-to-text it, quickly proofread it, and sent it to your printer. All right, next slide, please!

And then you can add a personal touch once you’ve printed your letter. Sign it by hand. It is good for people to see your handwriting.

It tells them just a little bit about your personality when they see your signature. And if you can, add a doodle, or a little one-line P.S. at the bottom in your handwriting.

And then you’re gonna mail it! It is that simple. Next slide!

(8:30) Let’s do this! All right, so take out your phone. Open the Notes app.

Now, I distributed basic request letters, our first inquiry letters from some of our newest pen pals at the facility that we are taking care of.

So, take a look at one of them. Just pick one of them that has a teeny-tiny bit, something more than just, “Please add me to your program.”

Because it would be nice to have just a tiny bit more information. That’s why I had each of you grab a couple.

And just give me a nod when you’ve got a letter that you could do this exercise with.

Also, this is a practice exercise. You do not have to mail this letter. Okay? This is just to practice doing this. You do not have to send it if you’re not ready for that.

We’ve got some nods.

Okay, so you’re gonna open a new Note on your phone, and you’re gonna click the little microphone.

And you’re gonna put it up closely, and speak softly so you don’t pick up somebody else’s conversation.

And we’re just gonna start really simply with, “Dear…” whatever their name is. Their first name. Do not do, “Mr. so-and-so or Ms. so-and-so.”

Because the emphasis on DOC numbers and last names is one of the dehumanizing things over time.

Receiving a letter where you might feel you were being more formal or polite to use their last name is actually not as good. So just go with first names.

So, “Dear First Name, Nice to meet you! I hear you would like a PrisonCare Pen Pal Encourager. I guess I should start by telling you a little bit about myself.”

So, record that into your Note, and then tap to turn your microphone off.

Have you got that first line? If there are mistakes in it, you can go back and fix them later.

We’ll go on to the next slide!

(10:00) So, we have a list of Letter Starters, and I, uh, that’s a free PDF that’s on the PrisonCare website. I’m gonna send paper copies to everyone on this team.

For now, I just pre-chose 4 of the fill-in-the-blank starters for you, and we’re gonna use those.

So, “I do _______ for a living.” And then, “I loved/hated school when I was young. I am left-handed/right-handed. I grew up in a large/small family.”

So, you’re gonna tell them 4 things about yourself. So hit your microphone, and dictate.

And then, you have told them something about yourself, so we’re gonna go on to the next slide.

This points us to the letter that you’ve chosen to respond to. So look at what they sent you, and notice one personal thing that they mentioned.

A program they’re involved in. The fact that they feel lonely. The fact that they speak another language. Anything that distinguishes them as an individual.

And then you’re gonna dictate into your Note, “In your letter, you said you ________.” Whatever the thing is.

And then you’re gonna respond to what they shared with just a couple of appropriate words. “That’s great.” “That must be really hard.” “I feel for you.”

Something simple. So, one sentence reflecting back what they said personally…

…yeah, it’s gone. I don’t know. (off-camera: “I think you lost battery.”) Okay, I’ll just talk really loud!

Yeah, so let’s try this. “In your letter, you said you _____.” And then respond very simply with either compassion or enthusiasm.

Dictate away!

You guys are doing a bang-up job, and we are almost done! Next slide.

(11:30) You are going to express interest. One of the things that is just as hard for people on the inside as it is for us on the outside is to think of what to say.

They don’t know what to write, either. We hear this from our friends all the time, that when they started, they didn’t know what to write.

So, we’re gonna make it easy! We’re gonna ask a couple of specific questions. Non-threatening personal questions.

So, there are a bunch on the Starters list. I have chosen 2 for us to practice with.

You’re gonna say, “Tell me a little bit more about yourself! Are you a morning person or a night owl? Would you describe yourself as shy or outgoing?”

And then say, “I’m looking forward to hearing from you again.” Hit your microphone, and go for it!

You guys are rock stars, because the next slide has us bringing it on home!

And, again, on that PDF there is a whole list of potential closing lines to help you get started if you don’t feel comfortable starting something out of your own head.

For now, pick one of these, and dictate it into your Note.

“It will be cool to get to know one another,” or “I hope my letter brought you a smile today.”

(off camera: “Can we be a rebel and use both?”) And you can be a rebel and use both!

(13:00) Final slide is a look at the whole process. Voice-to-text using the Notes app on your phone.

Give it a quick proofread and edit. Send to your printer. Sign it by hand. Maybe add a one-line P.S. or a doodle. And mail it!

That’s it! It’s really that easy! And quick. That was actually less than 10 minutes, I think. Right? Okay!

————————————

So are you inspired? Did you pull your phone out and dictate along with the exercise? If you didn’t, that's okay. You can go back and play the podcast episode again, and this time you'll know, and you'll have your phone ready, and you can dictate your first letter.

(13:55) However, you come at this thing, whether you are an individual or a part of a team,

whether you have lots and lots of things to say, and you love to write letters, or whether you feel kind of timid and a little not sure, it doesn't matter.

You are uniquely you, and you are bringing yourself to a connection point with another unique human being. But the fascinating thing is that the other person, the person inside the fence, that unique person with whom you are going to connect through a penpal encourager relationship, lives in a neighborhood that is dehumanizing all day long, every day. All night long, every night

People who live inside a prison are having their humanity stripped away. They have to work so hard to hang on to the truth that, no, they really are a person. They are an individual. They are unique. And when you as a unique individual reach out and connect with them, in a unique and personal relationship through letters, you’re not just alleviating their boredom, you're not just saying supportive, kind things, so that you can know that you're pouring more goodness into the universe.

You are affirming the humanity of an individual who lives in an environment that is systematically designed to treat them as if they are not an individual human. The system is designed to plug them into a spot, and the spot is like everybody else's spot, and their clothes are like everybody else's clothes, and their food is like everybody else's food. Everything is designed to tear down their sense of individuality. Their sense of humanity. And when you connect is a penpal encourager, you are affirming their Humanity. So beautiful. It's so beautiful.

{ 16:10 } And I mean, let's just throw the net wider, because, you know, we're PrisonCare! So we care about everybody in the neighborhood, right? By affirming the humanity of individual residents with whom you are corresponding, you are empowering and equipping them to recognize and respect the humanity in each of the Corrections Officers that they deal with on a daily basis. You're making it possible for them to create a safer space for the COs, to create a less toxic space for the COs to create a space where a CO knows, “I’m not just a cop. I'm not just, “Hey, CO!” I'm a person, a person with a personality, and that personality is observed by the people who are under my authority. They see me as an individual.”

That's important for staff as well. Mental Wellness, all around, and you are providing it by simply choosing less than 10 minutes to True awesomeness, becoming a penpal encourager. So, I hope today’s very practical episode inspired you to just go for it. Just go for it. You have nothing to lose! You have nothing to lose, and so much to gain.

Thank you for listening. If you want to learn more, please visit prisoncare.org. And if you would like to become a partner in what we're doing, by giving financially, by founding a Compassion Team in your area.

{ 17:53 } By being interviewed here on the podcast! If you are connected to anything to do with the vision for PrisonCare…if you have a loved one who is incarcerated, if you are Corrections staff, if you have a loved one who is Corrections staff… any connection to the vision and mission of PrisonCare, please reach out. Sabrina@prisoncare.org, and maybe we can schedule a time to talk together on an episode of the podcast. Thank you, as always for caring.

Thanks for listening to The PrisonCare Podcast. be sure to visit us at prisoncare.org. PrisonCare — Equipping compassionate people to support positive prison culture from the outside, because everyone on the inside matters.

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